Time Freedom for Busy Mums

In our busy lives as mothers we often get caught up in our ‘never-ending’ to do list rather than enjoying life with our children.

This is something I have struggled with to maintain that balance of getting everything done and yet still being present with my children! I would often push myself to the limits to be that ‘perfect’ mother and as a result I would become a ‘screaming stressed out mess’ mother, with my children and husband bearing the brunt of my frustrations.
I was unhappy and constantly felt on edge as I rushed between everything that I needed to do. Yet what was I achieving? Clean floors or ironed clothes and becoming a mother who was overwhelmed with life and cranky all the time?

“I could not live this way anymore, and you do not need to either!”

I have now chosen to move away from this mayhem life and into a more peaceful and calmer life. Yet it is not as simple as that, let me tell you as life still does continue to get in the way (which is okay as ultimately life is full of ebbs and flows).

Here are my 6 crucial steps to getting in control of your life which I live my life by and also teach in my workshops and webinars:

1. Time management – get more organised in what you need to do. Cluster your jobs together when you can. Set up systems that help you become more organised and enlist the help of your children – allow them to be accountable for things. Create things to do lists where you can tick items off each day, with a sense of achievement.

2. Quality time with your children – create ‘magic’ moments with your children. It does not need to be long periods of time, yet small snippets of fun times with your children. You can do this in the car as we taxi our children around, at the dinner table, helping with the cooking etc. Undivided attention is all it takes, as it is in these moments that memories are created for you and your children.

3. Effective communication – talk to your children about what you expect from them and how you require it done. Role model to them the behaviour you want to see in them – don’t scream back in a fight as this is only teaching them how to scream more. Lower your voice and wait until the anger subsides before you bring in your teaching / consequence.

4. Start to look at the underlying causes of why you feel out of control / stressed – often what we are stressing about has nothing to do with what is going on around us at that moment. It could be an underlying issue like for me it was feeling like ‘I was not a good enough mother’. Once you can see what the root cause of the problem is, you can then take the steps to rectify this problem from the inside out!

5. Taking time out to appreciate all that you do – we do so much as mothers for everyone around us, yet we forget to acknowledge this as we quickly move onto the next job to be done. Taking time out to appreciate ourselves is important in a way of recognising our achievements (big or small) and also being compassionate to ourselves when life does not go exactly as we had imagined.

6. Learn to say NO! – We are not an endless pit of energy, we need to have balance in our lives – including downtime. Saying NO is a big thing as we don’t want to inconvenience or not help others around us. Yet in the process of taking on too much we let ourselves down. Learn to say NO to things that you can and focus on what is important your family.

Make a start today; by incorporating one of these steps into your life today (more if you can would be great!)
Remember it is not through reading this article that will make the change – that is the easy bit! The change will come when you start to easily incorporate these steps into your everyday busy life. Most importantly it is with ease to create the change, don’t over complicate it, and JUST BE.

The author Debbie is a busy Mum of 4 school age children. She is a successful Kinesiologist, author of Beyond the Schoolyard and Ambassador to Bully Zero Foundation Australia. For more information about Debbie or about any workshops and webinars she runs for busy Mums, please visit her webpage at www.debbierossi.com.au.